Bound 3 Be Better

There Goes My Hero...

Too alarming now to talk about
Take your pictures down and shake it out
Truth or consequence, say it aloud
Use that evidence, race it around

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary

Don't the best of them bleed it out
While the rest of them peter out
Truth or consequence, say it aloud
Use that evidence, race it around

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary

Kudos, my hero
Leaving all the best
You know my hero
The one that's on

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary
There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary

Seasonal Happiness...

Lakefront Brewery's seasonal  Pumpkin Lager

One of my favorite Pumpkin beers...and it doesn't hurt it's from one of my favorite breweries.  Just snatched one of the only two cases in North Miami.  I'm gonna suck up and shut up and dream of what Fall must be like in a place where the four seasons exist.  Its been 90-100 degrees here since last February.  I change my underwear twice a day on average.  I have a separate towel in the bathroom just to mop the sweat from my balls from when I have to be outside wading through Hell-midity.

New Species of Jellyfish Identified in Miami Beach

 Along the beautiful new Flamingo boardwalk in picturesque Miami Beach the creature is found...

The creature is seen here swimming in it's natural habitat looking out towards beautiful downtown Miami.

Closer inspection of the gelatinous zooplankton reveals a reservoir tip most likely used for navigation.

Lordy, Lordy, Look Who's...

Elevator Small Talk - Miami Style

I'm on the ground floor and step into the elevator with another woman.

I push my floor.  She pushes hers.

Doors open and I step out.

Me: "Goodbye"

Her: "You're Welcome, Thanks"

C'mon In! We're Closed!

I walk into this new deli/grocery store that recently opened to get a croissant for my daughter.  This place has had pretty good breakfasts in the past, but in Miami Beach nothing gold can stay.  It's one of the main reasons why so many places here don't last.  Everything goes to shit.  Don't even get me started on how my German Hofbrauhaus has somehow slowly morphed into Latin American fusion.
Anyways...I walk in and immediately get stink-eye from the youngest of the two workers.  She looks haggard, like she just walked in from clubbing all-night.  The other one blurts to me, "Can I help you?".
I ask for one croissant.
She taps her watch and says "Papi, nothing is ready...We open at 7"
I look at the clock above her head that reads 7:30.  Instead of arguing, I simply accept the ridiculousness of  living in this fucked up land, and leave with a smile, cursing them under my breath.  I used to work at a deli in Wisconsin & lived in NYC to tell you how it's done in the real world.  Do you think you could show up at a bagel shop in NYC the second the door opens, and not get a bag of warm, delicious bagels? Of course you would!  But I live in the land of idiocy! Usually people will get there an hour or two before you are actually open for business and prepare the food.  I know, this seems like common sense, right?  Not here.  God, I miss America...and stop calling me Papi.